It’s Arafat Day again ….

Another veil descends with grace,

An unseen screen, a silent face.

An electronic hum now binds,

Does it disturb what the spirit finds?

Does it halt the sacred flame,

Or dim the heart that calls His Name?

I do not know. I cannot see.

I’m at the mercy of decree.

On Arafat’s eve, I walk alone,

Two unseen hands around me thrown.

They squeeze my chest, they press, they hold,

A breath escapes, this tale grows old.

Yet still I walk, I must defy

This shadow draped across the sky.

But pain takes root in chest and side,

And nausea comes like rising tide.

A whisper warns, “You’ve felt this strain

On Istanbul’s remembered lane.”

Returning from a night of light,

Dhikr sung into the night.

I pause, and slowly turn around,

Each step now sacred, soft, profound.

A siren’s echo in my ear

Is it my time? Is parting near?

But no! not yet. The Lord knows best.

Though all I yearn for is His rest.

It’s Arafat: My inbox swells

With du‘as cast like sacred spells.

Once I stood with pilgrims pure,

Heart in hand, intentions sure.

Sometimes with lists, prepared and deep,

Sometimes just tears and prayers to weep.

They stopped my climb and said I must wait.

I bowed to rules and trusted fate.

But now, though far from that great land,

I feel His nearness close at hand.

My heart ascends a different hill,

A lonely quest, a silent will.

It seeks to rise, to break and fly,

An eagle cleaving through the sky.

But chains remain, earth’s work undone:

Goodbyes to speak, and webs to spun.

Forgiveness waits, and wounds to heal,

Old truths to face, and griefs to feel.

A tale of love, of loss and grace,

Still waits to find its resting place.

With Shakespeare’s tongue and heart laid bare,

I’ll write it down, I’ll place it there.

A mosque must cleanse, its roots renew,

Free youth from old, oppressive view.

The battles rage, the path is steep,

But some of us were born to weep…

And fight.

Still, when all is said and done,

When battles lost, or battles won,

This heart longs not for war or quest,

But only for eternal rest…..

“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.”

(Surah ar-Ra’d, 13:28)